The Muscle Man Defense

Have you ever heard of Muscle Man?  What? You haven’t?  Do you live under a rock?

I kid, of course. Muscle Man* is TLG’s fictional superhero.  We’ve been hearing about him for at least a year now.  Not only is he  huge, red and strong (he can lift TWO houses!) but he can do whatever he likes, and he has access to everything TLG can imagine.  As a result, we have a lot of conversations like this:

Mombie: “I’m sorry, darling, but there’s no such thing as the Playstation 52.  They are only up to Playstation 3.”

TLG: “Well, MUSCLE MAN, has a Playstation 52!  And he has all the games for it, too!  And if we go to his house we will be able to play them all and I will win!”

It’s amazing really, Muscle Man can do EVERYTHING, absolutely everything.  And he’s not limited by finances, time or even the laws of physics.  The added bonus is that he ensures that TLG is never wrong.

The Boy: “No, TLG, that’s not how you do it.  You have to jump over the crack.”

TLG: “The Boyyyy, that’s how (insert condescension here) Muscle Man does it.  In Muscle Man’s world, that’s how you do it.”

The Boy: “(loud sigh) FINE, TLG, but we don’t live in Muscle Man’s world.”

I’m sure this is extremely appealing to a four year old who is probably tired of being taught things all the time.  It must be nice to be so very solidly right.

So, I’m thinking of adopting this sort of approach to conversation, just for my own amusement.  I just have to think of a situation that makes my every statement true.  Maybe I can invoke Wonder Woman instead.


*FYI – Muscle Man lives in Toronto.  But not the CITY Toronto, his Toronto is called Muscle Man’s Toronto, but he visits the City of Toronto sometimes.  I have now typed Toronto so often that it has lost all meaning.

2 thoughts on “The Muscle Man Defense

  1. This design is spectacular! You obviously know how to keep a reader amused.
    Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my
    own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it.

    Too cool!

Comments are closed.