Sometimes, a little bit of happiness just shows up on your front step.

Or, in my case, on the path to my front step.

I just love how these leaves and flowers and bits of grass fell right here.

I need a better plan for Mondays.

I often have trouble launching my week. I feel sluggish and tired and a bit overwhelmed by the week ahead and I kind of just want to read and drink tea.

Reading and drinking tea would be fine if I was relaxing into it but on the kind of Monday I am thinking of I have to put a lot of energy into mentally pushing away my to do list so I can read.

So it never feels relaxing and it never feels energizing, it’s just kind of a holding pattern.

As I write this, I’m reminded that this is another version of being ‘in-between’ – a (metaphorical) location that makes my life difficult.

When my kids were small, I would be in-between when I hadn’t had enough sleep and I thought I might be able to nap when they napped so I wouldn’t do anything to fully wake myself up. I might stay in my PJs longer than usual, I might not do anything energizing, I would inadvertently stay in sleepy mode so it would theoretically be easier to get back to sleep when I had a chance.

Spoiler: It NEVER worked out.

No matter how much I tried, I would either not get the chance to go back to sleep or I would find out that I had managed to wake myself up anyway and couldn’t nap when the opportunity arose.

What I needed to do on those sleepy days was to kindly and gently wake myself up by going through my routine and adding in a little extra movement or some time outside.

On the days that I did that, I actually felt a lot better – even if I didn’t get a nap.

In fact, every time I have successfully navigated the in-between, it was a result of making a decision one way or the other.

Today, that would look like making a decision to read and drink tea OR making a decision to go through my day as if I had my normal energy.

(Meanwhile, please note that at no time will I be beating myself up about how I feel or what I get done. That is never part of the plan.))

And since I know how I want to feel at the end of the day (satisfied with my activities) and I know what will bring me to that (knocking a few tasks off my list), I know what my decision will be:

Following my usual routine – just a little later than usual and a little more flexibly than usual – and ambling through my list.

I should note, though, that my list includes reading and drinking tea for at least 15 minutes so I might start there. 😉

I thought it would be fine to share my banana with the dog.

(By breaking off pieces to give her – we weren’t alternating bites or anything!)

She, however, felt that she should have her own banana – or so I assume since she was looking at me like this just now.

I’m really happy with how I spent my first Saturday of summer.

I read and drank iced tea and did some lawn work and listened to a podcast – all without feeling stressed or rushed and without any sense that I had to finish anything.

I hope I can come back to this feeling again and again.

If you believe what the lilacs outside my front door tell you, apparently this spring has been good for them.