General Sorts of Stuff

Last Day of School…ish.

All day, my Facebook feed was filled with families celebrating the last day of school. I’m thrilled for them but I feel weird about the last day of school this year.

I mean, for starters, school has been long over for everyone in our house. My eldest finished his university term a couple of months ago and my homeschooled youngest son finished his Grade 11 classes in the first week of June.

So today wasn’t our last anything, really.

And, of course, since we were doing lessons at the kitchen table, the change from homeschool to no school was not the definitive change that it would have been if he had been going to regular classes.

It’s just a bit odd and I feel a bit melancholy about it.

I can remember all those times walking home with the kids on the last day of school singing the little song we had made up to celebrate my eldest’s last day of kindergarten. It was always so exciting to be schedule-free and ready to just hang out together.

It’s natural for things to change, of course, and I am really okay with it, just kind of nostalgic and wishing there was a bit more ceremony for this second last ‘last day of school!’ for our family.

This time next year, my youngest will have graduated high school. I’ll have to be sure to create more ceremony around the very last last day.

Meanwhile, I am thrilled for all those excited kids and excited parents and relieved and excited teachers. This year has been a hard slog for everyone and they all deserve some damn rest.

This gif goes out to my friend Jan who is an amazing teacher and a big fan of the Muppets.

I’m proud of you and your hard work, my dear friend, enjoy your summer!

Muppet Kermit the frog flails his arms while sitting on the edge of a large desk.
Image description: a gif of Kermit the frog sitting on the edge of desk and flailing his arms. The text beneath reads ‘LAST DAY!!!!!!’

Feeling Sick Is Boring

I found out a couple of years ago that the headaches that have plagued me for years are actually migraines. They have been relatively infrequent, just a few times a year, but they have been awful. Finding out that they were migraines was a kind of relief, actually, because it made me learn to take better care of myself instead of trying to power through them.

Over the last year though, things have taken a different turn and I have been having ‘silent’ migraines. All of the other awful symptoms but with no actual head pain.

I have a few days of being unfocused and sleepy (which I only notice in retrospect) and then I have an evening of feeling hellish.It’s horrible, of course, but it passes fairly quickly.

It’s the next day that really upsets me though.

That’s the day I feel better than I did but still not good. I’m well enough to do necessary things but not up to doing much. I feel okay enough to feel weird about lying around but I know that, if I don’t rest, this feeling will go on longer.

I can read but I’m not very focused. I can’t watch a tv show without feeling a bit nauseated. I don’t feel up to drawing. I’m too bleh to have a conversation.

It’s just boring, boring, boring.

Apparently, I *can* write a blog post though. 😉

A photo looking up at light fixture ceiling fan with brown blades.
My view all day. Image description: a photo looking up at a light fixture/fan with brown fan blades on a white ceiling. The top edge of a window can be seen at the bottom of the photo.

A Pause In My Day

One of the problems with having ADHD is that prevents you using time effectively.

So, I can be ‘working’ at my desk for hours but because I have switched tasks so often, I don’t have anything to show for it.

That can lead to more time at my desk in an effort to finish my tasks…and…and…so on.

As part and parcel of those executive function issues, I can lose track of the need to take a break. it’s not about me being a ‘workaholic’ or ‘Type A’ – I’m neither of those things. It’s a perception issue.

My plan is always to ‘just finish this and then take a break.’ Unfortunately, between the time it takes me to ‘just finish this’ and my challenges around understanding how long a given task will take, I can reach the end of the day having only taken a break for lunch. (And I only remember that because my husband comes home to lunch – which creates a distinct marker for lunch time. I rarely, if ever, forget to eat, but sometimes I multitask my lunchtimes.)

So, one of my goals for this summer to prioritize my break times.

I’m picking a time during the work day when I am going to relax for at least 15 mins. More, if my schedule allows.

That’s why this afternoon found me on my front step, reading, drinking tea, and watching the clouds.

So far, so good!

A view of a suburban neighbourhood and the sky, seen though a patio railing.
The view from my chair on the front step. Image description: A view of cars, houses, lilacs and the sky as scene through the black metal uprights and wooden railings of a set of steps.

My View When Writing

I have never seen myself as someone in need of protection but Khalee keeps an eye on me just in case.

This afternoon, I looked over from my writing to discover that she was doing slight more active surveillance than usual.

?

A light-haired dog is lying on her belly on a bed.
Image description: Khalee, a white and light brown dog, rests on Christine’s quilt. She’s watching Christine take her photo. There is a grey and black cardigan on the edge of the bed nearest the camera.

Gold Stars

Over the past few years, I have been giving out gold stars to coaching clients and to friends to celebrate their efforts towards whatever they happen to be working on.

I also give them to myself when I have put effort into something that is challenging for me.

Today, I’m celebrating my efforts to find a schedule that works for me.

(And for posting on my blog for 6 days in a row. Now that the habit is forming, I’ll move towards more variety and actual writing in my posts. 😉 )

GIF of a star being drawn in neon lights on a background
Image description: GIF of a star being draw in neon lights on a black background.